In Memory of Troy

Troy no longer lives on this earth. I say this to make myself believe it even now--after three long days. He died flying his F-16 near a group of insurgents in Baghdad. Our U.S. ground forces were surrounded by enemies. F-16s were called in to strafe the area at low level. Somehow, in the middle of the fray, Troy's jet crashed and Troy passed from this life into his Father's arms. I still cry as I read these words--as though they are brand new to me--as though I haven't repeated them to myself twenty times a day.

O come, thou Dayspring from on high,
And cheer us by thy drawing nigh;
Disperse the gloomy clouds of night,
And death's dark shadows put to flight.
Rejoice! Rejoice! Emmanuel
Shall come to thee, O Israel.

It is to us that the gloomy clouds of night are left. It is to Brian, who silently mourns the loss of a friend who was, essentially, a brother. And, most harmfully, to Ginger, his faithful and capable wife. And to his sons Boston and Greyson. And to his daughters Isabella, Annaliese, and Aspen who will not remember their Daddy well enough. And to countless friends and fellow pilots. And to me. It is to us that the days seem dark and the nights seem long without our friend. It is to us that death's dark shadows all but drown out the memories of Troy's amazing chicken fried steak, his booming laughter, his copious hugs that flew so naturally from his Texas arms, his love of wrestling with his boys and ours. It is to us that the gloomy clouds of night encroach upon our knowledge of him as a hero, an unfailing friend, a romantic husband, and a passionate father.

But Troy, who once told us that he prayed Psalm 144 before he flew, knew that "Man is like a breath; His days are like a passing shadow." He knew the risks and he was willing to pay the price because he knew that the Lord has numbered all our days. The enemies have stolen his body but Jesus was 2000 years quicker on the uptake. He said "Do not fear those who kill the body but cannot kill the soul. But rather fear Him who is able to destroy both soul and body in hell. Are not two sparrows sold for a copper coin? And not one of them falls to the ground apart from your Father's will. But the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Do not fear, therefore, you are of more value than many sparrows" Matthew 10:28-31. Troy confessed his Heavenly Father before men and now his Savior is confessing Troy before his Heavenly Father.

Someday soon the Lord will speak peace to us as well--even here in this postmodern life and on this groaning earth--just as He did 2000 years ago. Isaiah 51:12 "I, even I, am He who comforts you. Who are you that you should be afraid of a man who will die, and of the son of a man who will be made like grass?" We are not afraid. We will soon rejoice. The Dayspring from on High will, one morning, awaken us with joy. Emmanuel will come to us. Oh Lord, we believe. Help thou our unbelief!